I’ve always wondered why on Earth Barack Obama picked Joe Biden to be his VP. There must have been strategic gains that overcome Biden’s infamous tendency to put his foot in his mouth. Regardless, it makes for great comedy. Here’s the Vice President of the United States on the Today Show this morning doing his best to further panic the sheeple over the swine flu. Stay away from the airplanes and subway cars people.
Posts Tagged ‘NYC’
Great bucket drumming from NYC
February 5, 2009Drummer Larry Wright lays down some very nice grooves in the Times Square subway station.
Beatboxing flute and cello player at Union Square subway in NYC
February 1, 2009Very nice work.
Nunchaku baseball player awaits obscene contract offer from New York Yankees
October 26, 2008We anticipate a fierce bidding war between the Red Sox and Yankees over this guy.
Via Japan Probe
Dancing midget Michael Jackson
August 26, 2008I can’t believe I just typed that.
Camera catches NYPD officer as he drops his shoulder and sends a bicyclist sprawling through air
July 29, 2008**Update** According to documents obtained by The Smoking Gun, NYPD Officer Pogan’s version of the events don’t exactly line up with the video below.
Pogan offered a fantastical version of the incident. Pogan claimed that Long drove his bicycle directly into him, knocking the cop to the ground and causing “lacerations on deponent’s forearm.”
Officer Patrick Pogan, a 23 yr. old rookie on his first month on the job, is currently on suspension while the matter is investigated. He’s really overdoing it in his quest to to win Rookie of the Year. After being knocked to the ground, the victim, sorry…”suspect,” Christopher Long, was then charged with attempted assault, disorderly conduct and resisting arrest. According to Worldnetdaily.com (a website that is about as pro-military/police/flag and anti-ACLU as you can get:
Pogan reported that Long was weaving in traffic, “forcing multiple vehicles to stop abruptly or change their direction” to avoid a collision, a point contested by several riders behind the bicyclist.
Pogan also cited Long for physically struggling during the arrest, refusing to put his hands behind his back, “thereby making handcuffing difficult.”
Check out the video below. If the cop wanted to stop this guy, I think he probably could have done so. Officer Pogan doesn’t raise his hands to signal Long to stop, he just waits until he’s next to him and checks him hard to the concrete. Incident happens around the 0:25 mark. Police brutality apologists, quickly turn your brains off, and being your defense……now.
F.O.O.L.S. (Friends of Oompa Loompas Society) has its first ever chapter meeting.**YourDailyChum.com Exclusive**
June 22, 2008
As we mentioned in our story about Oompa Loompas being allowed to attend a high school prom, Oompa Loompas everywhere are riding a wave of enthusiasm and hope as society’s barriers continue to fall for the once maligned orange-skinned people. Excitement was in the air as the nation’s first chapter of F.O.O.L.S (Friends of Oompa Loompas Society) had its opening meeting last night at (name withheld by request of owner), a local restaurant in New York City. While turnout did not meet expectations, F.O.O.L.S president and charter member, Jessica Scrote de Amor, said she was pleased that a restaurant agreed to host the event.
“The fact that (name withheld by request of owner) proudly hosted this event shows how far we Oompa Loompas have come. Considering the discrimination we’ve faced in the past, the treatment we’ve received here shows that more and more people are becoming F.O.O.L.S.”
John D. Bag, pictured above, wasn’t as enthusiastic about the meeting, eventually admitting that he and his girlfriend, pictured above, opposite John, had literally, stumbled upon the F.O.O.L.S. meeting.
“Dude, we were drunk off our asses that night. We heard this high-pitched voice singing Nickelback in the back room,” Bag said. He continued, “We walked in thinking we could do some karaoke and hit a helium tank. Out of nowhere this orange freak comes at us, snapping pictures. We tried to get away, but she offered us chocolate and candy to pose for pictures with us. I eventually figured out she was an Oompa Loompa. Those freaks scare me, man.”
Thanks to our friends at HotChickswithDouchebags.com for providing us with this news tip.
New NYC tourism campaign: Come and catch a show, STD
June 10, 2008
Study: One-Fourth Of NYC Residents Have Herpes
Rates Of Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, And Infectious Syphilis Are Also Higher Than The National Average
NEW YORK (CBS) ― Now might be the time for New Yorkers to take advantage of the free condom campaign the city promotes. A new study by the city’s Health Department found more than a quarter of adult residents are infected with the herpes virus.
According to the study, 26 percent of city residents have the virus that causes genital herpes, an incurable sexually-transmitted infection that can cause painful genital sores and can double a person’s risk for HIV.
Nationally, 19 percent of the population has the infection, according to the department.
More specifically, the study showed that the rate is higher among women than men – 36 percent compared to 19 percent – and was higher among blacks than whites – 49 percent versus 14 percent, respectfully.
It also found the rate was higher among gay men than heterosexual men – 32 percent compared to 18 percent.
“Genital herpes alone will not cause serious problems for most people,” said Dr. Julia Schillinger, Director of Surveillance for the Health Department’s Bureau of STD Prevention and Control and lead author of the study. “But some people will have painful genital sores and the infection fosters the spread of HIV. We advise New Yorkers to protect themselves and others. Using condoms consistently will help you avoid getting or spreading genital herpes.”
The data come from the city’s Health and Nutrition Examination Survey, which used door-to-door interviews and in-person medical exams to assess the health of New Yorkers on a variety of measures, from diabetes to depression, according to the department.
The study was the city’s first measurement of those infected with the virus. Herpes is not the only STD above the national rate in New York City. Rates of Chlamydia, gonorrhea, and infectious syphilis were also higher than the national rate.
Free NYC condoms are available at locations throughout the city. Call 311 or visit http://www.nyc.gov/condoms for more information.
Put on a full-body condom before reading this.
“Drank”-the anti-energy drink
June 9, 2008
“The anti-energy drink we’re calling the extreme relaxation beverage.”
Turns out, this is a carbonated, grape-flavored beverage spiked with melatonin, valerian root and rose hips. Apparently it is “very, very popular in Houston,” and it’s sold throughout the south in liquor and convenience stores.
What, you might wonder, was the creator thinking? I’m glad you asked. He was thinking of the hip hop community. Direct from the press release:
From design to production, every aspect of this calming drink was inspired by today’s popular hip hop artists who embrace the much sought-after hip hop lifestyle that encourages people to capture a stress-free state of mind.
The drink’s tagline is “slow your roll.” So if that’s something you need to do, keep your eye out. Drank will be hitting stores in New York soon.
Your Daily Chum 