Onion panelists debate the very real likelihood that the Chinese government is luring the world to Beijing to spring the mother of all traps on the international community. Tigers, dragons, and spike-lined pits are in our Olympians future.
Posts Tagged ‘Communism’
The Beijing Olympics: Are they a trap?
July 31, 2008Sad because dog meat is off the menu in Beijing during the Olympics? Fear not, seal penis is still available.
July 30, 2008
As we reported 2 weeks ago, the Chinese government ordered restaurants in Beijing to stop serving dog meat during the time Beijing hosts the 2008 Summer Olympics. Something about scaring the Western tourists, etc……
But, fear not, because niche parts of assorted animals can still be purchased at a new speciality penis eatery in Beijing. Besides horse penis with a chili dip, customers can order the member of a seal, which is apparently a delicacy. Before you make any condescending remarks, remember that cultures vary around the world in cuisine, music, art, etc., so don’t be so closed minded. All of you xenophobes can eat a dick.
Howard Stern realizes what many have known for a long time regarding the modern Democratic party-“They’re for communism.”
July 24, 2008
Long-time liberal Democrat Howard Stern swore off voting for Democrats altogether during a segment on his radio show today. Stern was peeved at hearing how Dems on the FCC board refused to approve the merger between Sirius and XM Radio despite the Justice Dept. giving its ok.
“The fact that these Democrats on the FCC are communists,” Stern said. “They’re for communism. They don’t want to see companies – this is gangsterism. I said, ‘This is crazy.’”
Full audio of Stern’s comments here.
Welcome to Beijing: Please ignore the Communism-the official song of the 2008 Summer Olympics
July 22, 2008
Chinese Police practice killing free-speech advocates…err..I mean “terrorists.”
July 3, 2008
Chinese elite anti-terror police officers are wheeling into action ahead of next month’s Beijing Olympics on two-wheeled scooters.
Members of the country’s armed police unit practised on the Segway models that have been re-named ‘Anti-Terror Assault Vehicles’ in the eastern province of Shandong.
Officials have bought 100 Segways and painted some in military camouflage to patrol airports and sporting venues during the Games.
In one drill, police posing as terrorists held ten badminton audience members hostage, ‘shooting dead’ four ‘hijackers’, capturing two and defusing a mock car bomb.
The exercise was to test the province’s emergency response and involved 1,500 people.
The Segway was the brainchild of American Dean Kamen, who claimed at its 2001 launch that it would make the car obsolete in congested cities. It has since been the object of some derision, however.
The two-wheeled self-balancing machine – powered by an electric motor – allows users to travel as fast as 12.5mph while standing up.
Source
Stuff White People Like contest winner #4-Comparing People to Hitler
June 25, 2008The always funny blog, StuffWhitePeopleLike.com recently sponsored a contest for reader submissions and here’s an excerpt below of winner #4.
Stuff White People Like: Comparing People to Hitler
It’s also critical that you avoid the fatal mistake of getting creative and comparing people you don’t like to other evil dictators, such as Joseph Stalin or Fidel Castro. With few exceptions, white people are actually fond of almost any dictator not named Hitler, and your remark that “this is just like something Mao Zedong would do” will be met with blank stares and possible social alienation. This is because, with the exception of Hitler, oppressive dictators share a passion for many of the things white people love- such as universal health care, conspiracy theories, caring about poor people while being filthy rich, and cool hats. Stick to the script and
compare things you don’t like to Hitler, and Hitler alone.
Cuba to abandon salary “equality”
June 12, 2008
Somewhere, a bunch of middle and upper class people who have no concept of the poverty most Cubans live in, are wailing. Cuban officials are apparently catching on to what free-market advocates have known for decades. Marxism has been berry, berry bad. Good for Cuba.
Cuba to abandon salary equality
Cuba is to abolish its system of equal pay for all and allow workers and managers to earn performance bonuses, a senior official has announced.
Vice-Minister for Labour Carlos Mateu said the current system – in place since the communist revolution in 1959 – was no longer “convenient”. He said wage differentiation should improve production and services. President Raul Castro has introduced a series of reforms since succeeding his ailing brother Fidel in February.
Writing in the communist party newspaper Granma Mr Mateu said workers would receive a minimum 5% bonus for meeting targets but with no ceiling on salaries. Managers could earn a 30% bonus if the team working under them increased production, he said.
The minister pointed out that the current wage system sapped employees’ incentives to excel since everyone earned the same regardless of performance.
“It’s harmful to give a worker less than he deserves, it’s also harmful to give him what he doesn’t deserve,” the newspaper article said.
But the impact in terms of purchasing power will be limited, the BBC’s Michael Voss in Havana says.
The average wage in Cuba for everyone – from doctors to farm labourers – is about $20 (£10) a month. Even before the recent sharp rise in oil and food prices Cuba was spending billions of dollars on imports, and that bill is likely to rise sharply, our correspondent says.
So far most of the reforms announced since Raul Castro took over the presidency have involved lifting restrictions such as the bans on mobile phones and computers.
The latest change is a more fundamental challenge to Marxist economic orthodoxy, our correspondent adds.
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